Public Service Europe - European politics
Schadenfreude

No need for UK-EU audit William Hague - we've done it for you


by our secret columnist in Brussels
03 August 2012
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As the British Foreign Secretary attempts to appease raging Eurosceptics in his own party with an audit of the UK's relationship with the EU - our resident satirist Schadenfreude beats him to the punch, with a full rundown of the pros and cons of membership, and a status report on how things stand currently. Happy reading William Hague – there is no charge for this stocktaking service

Britain's Foreign Secretary William Hague has announced that there will be a "stocktaking" of Britain's membership of the European Union. It appears to be a partial response to the demand within the Conservative Party for a referendum on membership. So can we morph into Nostradamus and confidently predict the result? Well, the enquiry is unnecessary. Trade Exports of goods and services have prospered.

The EU now accounts for around half of the United Kingdom's overseas trade. Even better, although Britain runs a deficit with the rest of the union, it covers more of it than it does in trade with the rest of the world. Inward and outward investment is highly profitable for the country. London's financial market is a world leader. And to travel - British citizens enjoy visa-free travel throughout the EU and the European Economic Area.

What about migration - I hear you ask. Several million Brits earn their livelihood working in the EU. Britain is host to countless key workers from other member states including seasonal staff, who are a mainstay of the farming industry. The country has some concerns over the influx of foreign workers and the effects on home-based employment, but the immigrants are a testimony to the attractiveness of the UK and its economic potential

Regulation - Britain has strong support in arguing for less but better regulation. It firmly intends to secure repatriation of Brussels regulations, which it considers damaging and shall shortly announce the initiatives the country will take - especially in the field of social policy. Meanwhile Britain is successfully protecting the economy against over-regulation of the financial sector despite what appear to be gaps in its own dispositions.

Cost - the cost of membership is too high. The UK is working on new rules to limit its growth and, with the support of other member states, is pursuing all possibilities of efficiency savings. Common Foreign and Security Policy - it is as yet in its early stages and the UK constantly ensures that it is consistent with United Nations objectives. Britain is actively supporting the European External Action Service to which it has provided key staff. There have been no further moves towards a Common Defence Policy, which if active would weaken the North Atlantic Treaty Organisation.

The eurozone - the UK's own prosperity is linked with the continuing functioning of the single currency. It has carefully limited any commitment to subsidise countries in difficulty and strongly supports plans for a more active role for the European Central Bank - to secure more stable markets for state borrowing. Enlargement - the UK strongly supports the accession of new members and the contribution they bring with them.

So on balance membership of the EU, coupled with careful regard for UK national interests, are key factors in domestic policies. Britain's detachment from what are some of the more integrative ambitions of other member states ensures that the country has the best of both worlds – unity and sovereignty, the traditional policies of the country's history.
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Talk about over simplified spin.
Matthew Tysoe - Wellingborough, England

Sorry, but you need to do better than this flippant list of assertions. You do nothing here to show any connection between EU membership as it currently is designed and any of the the advantages you set out. Nor do you demonstrate that leaving the EU or renegotiating our position will cost us any of these advantages.
The problem with the the UK's EU membership is that there is a disconnect between membership and its costs - with the supposed economic advantages. The truth is that most of what the UK wants she can either provide for herself by leaving her borders open to trade and migrants, or under the umbrella of the World Trade Organisation.
The costs of UK membership constantly mounting with ever more regulation as well as direct costs, while the returns are diminishing. There is an argument about where exactly the two will pass each other and the UKs membership will go 'into the red', but we are certainly nearly there - if not already so. The EU's net benefit to the UK economy is somewhere between +1 per cent of gross domestic product and -1 per cent of GDP, on a downward trend. The Commonwealth just overtook the EU on GDP and the Anglosphere beckons. Meanwhile, the EU constantly tries to impose a fake identity on the British people; thereby leaving us feeling alienated and angry.
At the same time, it seeks to undermine our common law and replace it with alien civic law. And always it wants more money and more power. The EU needs to understand that the British do not think much of it and want less of it. We want an economic relationship built upon trade only and we want out of everything else. Best of luck to you. You will always be our friends and trade partners, but we will never identify with you.
There is nothing in our hearts for the EU. We will always look to the sea and to our sister nations across the globe where our heart lies. Our relationship must bend or break. It is better that we all seek to refashion it together through good will.
700islands - UK

I agree wholeheartedly with Matthew Tysoe but have an additional point to make that is not 'priced' in the balance sheet of EU membership: the plutocrats of the EU are anti-democratic at their core. The single main aim of the EU institutions is to enhance their power, not the democratic power of the people of Europe.
There can be no true democracy within a federal Europe, the clear aim of Brussels, until there is a common language so that there is real freedom of movement and that will never happen. For the French would not allow it unless the language were French, which would be patently absurd.
CH - London, England

All this flannel might be right but give the public what they want, a referendum. Then we who have to suffer the downside of it - we can decide yeh or ney. I'm sure responsible adults can vote for the best way forward.
Vaughan James - Birmingham, Great Britain, not the EU

This is a conglomeration of seemingly incongruous statements of which I doubt their is any substance to actual fact. In reality, their has been little consultation with the British electorate as to this evolving superstate we have drifted into. Governments seem to feel they have an automatic mandate, upon election, to form or dissolve associations with international powers that have substantial consequence upon those who elect them. That power should be limited without a referendum.
Immigration has had a major impact upon not only our infrastructure but our inherent culture. I bet that more have come here than Britons have migrated to the Europe - correct? To me that is an issue, as I pay for it, I would like to have been consulted on as a separate issue.
Taylor - London, UK, taxpayer

EU? What a travesty of corruption. They havent signed off their accounts for their budget for nearly 20 years and dont get me started on the anti-motorbike legislation they try to get through by falsifying safety reports. We are better off out. Reclaim our national waters and restart trade with growing economies.
Andrew Lippitt - Newbury, UK

Oh ha ha ha haaaa. At the title. I've no doubt he has - question is - is it acurate or is it full of discrepancies or just good old fashioned holes.
"The continuing functioning of the single currency" are you attempting humor? Because its bearly functioning at all; countries are now in more debt than they have ever been before.
They called the people conspiracy theorists that talked about it and now, as we see, it's coming to pass. if you think that a one world government is good - go ask the Mayans, Romans, Babylonians or Egyptian Pharaohs. Oh wait, you cant because their civilisations crumbled and fell from within.
Woderwick - UK

None of the above get it, do they.
Schadenfreude (himself) - PublicServiceEurope.com

Thankfully, no. All you need to do to cut through the self-deluding spin that EU institutions try to convince themselves of is to talk to someone with no involvement in EU politics, and witness their utter bemusement.
James - Brussels

The British people are increasingly sick to the back teeth of the pro-EU propaganda and outright lies fed to us for over 40 years. Ever increasing costs. Ever increasing bail-out demands. Ever decreasing fish stocks. Ever increasing insane regulations. Ever increasing immigrants without a chance of standing on their own feet.
The time is coming when apathy is pushed aside, and disobedience erupts with us, the people, against them, the politicians. Then we'll see who is for the EU. These traitors to the British People will get their due. And it won't be pretty. Not least for the wholesale gifting of the public's powers they signed away to Brussels, without once consulting those in whose name they pretend to serve.
Steve K - UK, not EU-SSR

"None of the above get it, do they. Schadenfreude (himself)." Nope. Satire is wasted, on the brain-dead.
JAFO - Melbourne, Australia